Category: inspiration

feminism, inspiration, life, tv

20 Years of Buffy

ramblingmads

Friday was the 20th anniversary of the first airing of Buffy the Vampire Slayer – one of the defining tv shows of my life. 

Final seasons Scooby Gang
I remember watching the first season on BBC2 with my little sister and my dad, and just thinking here was a show that spoke to me. I was just starting secondary school and those teenage monsters were very familiar. 

Now we were all supposed to be in love with David Boreanaz’s tortured vampire-with-a-soul Angel but I must admit I do love a bad boy – there was a huge poster of Spike (James Marsters) on my bedroom wall.

“I’m a bad rude man”

The monsters as metaphors is a construct as old as story telling but these were monsters A teenage girl with a sharp stick and a great line in quips could kill. That’s a pretty empowering thing for any young woman. 

Buffy dealt with bullies, death, a bratty sister, love, heartbreak, exams and friendships – all the things we all go through. She showed us the way. How many times did you want to quite literally stab your heart breaking ex through the heart with a wooden stake. 

And then there was the kickass soundtrack. I still have all 3 of the soundtrack cds – including the musical episode ‘Once More With Feeling’.

Mr Pointy

I have trouble picking a favourite episode, character etc but here’s my highlights. 
The silent episode ‘Hush’ was masterful. And proves the cast can all act. 

Xander and Willow’s relationship is definitely a friendship to aspire to – he saves her from becoming full on evil Willow with the power of his love for his best pal. And then there’s the Snoopy dance (bless Nicholas Brendon for still doing this at fan conventions). 

When everyone loses their memories and Spike and Giles think they’re father and son (and Spike’s called Randy) 

My ideal tea party

Faith – just too damn cool for school. But also power crazed, murderous and just a tad unhinged. 

Five by five

The Halloween episodes – vamps took the night off but all sorts of havoc would break loose. My favourite was either when everyone became their costumes (Buffy as an actual damsel in distress) or when they get trapped in a haunted house and have to defeat a fear demon – who’s about 3 inches high! 

Squished

Tara and Willow’s beautiful falling in love story. Pretty much the first sane sex couples I remember seeing on tv. Sweet, sad, romantic and tragic. 

😭😭

How much I hated Riley the cardboard soldier and that whole plotline – even more than the Glory/Dawn storyline and I really hated that. 

Eurgh
When did Buffy sleep? Demon fighting by night and school by day. What a hero, or serious caffeine habit. 

How sad I was when it all ended. 

Me too Anya, me too

This weekend I am planning a boxset binge to mark the anniversary – anyone else? 

inspiration, life, thoughts, wedding

Wedding Wednesday: a prep timeline

ramblingmads

This is my incredibly scatter brained approach to wedding planning. My wedding is about 18 months away now, but I started planning a while after C proposed. I wasn’t one of those girls who planned their dream wedding as a kid so I’ve had to learn a lot fast. 

💍Get engaged. Or decide to get married. If photoshoots are your thing or a party, do that. We got a new fridge. So rock ‘n’ roll.  

👰Are you going to have a long engagement? Or do you want to get married relatively soon? If it’s the second- pick a date. C and I very romantically picked a date a month and a day after C’s birthday so he wouldn’t forget our anniversary. 

🎁Set a budget. Are you paying for it or is there some money set aside? I had no idea my Dad had been saving since I was a baby, and that has really helped with paying deposits. 

👱Guestlist time! Who do you want to share your day with? Do you want bridesmaids/groomsmen or even bridesmen or groomswomen? 

💒 Start looking at venues. Popular ones can be booked up very quickly.  Depending on what kind of wedding you want, this can affect your venue choices. We are having a traditional church wedding and then a big knees up, very relaxed and informal to follow.  

🌹Once you have sorted the venue – start looking at vendors like florists, photographers etc. I actually found my photographer before I picked our reception venue. Again, try not to leave this too late as popular vendors get heavily booked, especially at peak times of the year. 

🎪What fun features do you want? A photobooth maybe, a band, lawn games? I suggest visiting wedding and event fairs to try these out or look online. Again, once you know what you want – book it. 

🎉Pinterest is your friend. Build inspiration boards for just about anything. I also use Etsy to look for ideas.  

💌Time to send out Save the Dates – most people seem to send these 18 months to a year before the wedding. I plan to send my invitations out about 6 months before so StDs are vital in making sure the people we want there the most can start making plans. 

🎂 Cake tastings are a great way to decide what you want- look online for ideas – most wedding cake makers are really happy to work with you on designs and flavours. 

❤Are you writing your own vows? What about readings? Research some ideas and work with your intended and celebrant to put your service together. 

 There’s lots more to do, from picking out outfits, deciding on hair and make up and designing menus. But I haven’t quite got that far yet and as my planning is a bit topsy-turvy I can’t really say what I’m going to do next.  

Any tips from married folks or engaged types are always welcome in the comments. 

The images are all from Pinterest – search ‘weddings’ for similar inspiration. 

inspiration, life, wedding

Wedding Wednesday

ramblingmads

This week – are you traditional or modern? 

I’m having a traditional church wedding and then a massive knees up after with kareoke and a photo booth. 
The church is one I went to as a kid, my mum’s still a member of the congregation. Which is how I get to marry there – you have to have a connection to the church and parish. There’s a rather scary looking legal form to sign to this effect. 

We’re not overly religious but both come from church going families and I like the idea of the traditional ceremony and legal bit all tied together. 

It helps that the church in question is over 150 years old and beautiful. Perfect for photos and full of history. 

We went to a friends’ wedding a few months ago and they had had a civil ceremony the day before at the registry office and then a more public do the next day. It was really lovely and personal, full of touches that were very them. The groom’s late mother collected hourglasses and as part of their wedding the couple poured sand into an hourglass, uniting their lives symbolically. 

I’ve been to weddings on boats, in barns, hotels and temples. I don’t think there is a right way or wrong way to do it as long as it means something to both of you. 

But I won’t be saying the traditional vows – definitely taking the promise to obey out of there. 

I also don’t really want speeches or a first dance. The speech thing really bothers me- the bride’s father, groom and best man all talk and the bride just sits there. 

It harks back to when marriage was a business contract and a woman was property and it makes me squirm. 

As for dancing, we’re not the most coordinated of people and having wiggled into am expensive fancy dress I really don’t need the Mr running it over with his grubby wheelchair wheels (apparently suggesting he go through the car wash is mean). 

I don’t actually like being the centre of attention or having my picture taken so that in itself is a bit anxiety ridden. 

I’m still looking for the perfect party venue for after the church. We know what we want it’s just finding it. No sit down meal of lukewarm food that nobody really enjoys, no trying to guess what our guests will enjoy. 

We want a buffet of nice tasty treats, maybe a chocolate fountain, definitely a pick ‘n’ mix station and a fruit salad bar. Drinks for those that drink and tea and coffee on tap (we’re both from families of tea fiends). 

There should be a dance floor for the jukebox/kareoke machine we’re hiring filled with our favourite party tunes, we’re having a photo booth so our friends can take silly snaps, and if there’s some outdoor space a few lawn games, like giant jenga and boules; perfect for our more competitive guests. 

Casual, relaxed and informal, perfectly balanced against the traditional ceremony before hand. 

Even more exciting are my planned vendors – but you’ll have to wait and see next time. 

inspiration, life, wedding

Wedding Wednesday

ramblingmads

An occasional series about planning my wedding. 

This week – inspiration 

Wedding planning is slowly taking shape and I’ve been collecting ideas and inspiration from all sorts of places. 

Pinterest – this is the biggy, there are hundreds of ideas and images shared here, so I’ve been looking at decorations, venues, dresses, flowers, cakes, everything basically. 

Etsy – there are lots of fabulous things to buy here, from decorations to dresses, cake toppers to thank you cards. I’ve built a shopping list of my favourites to buy once I’ve got the budget sorted. 

Bloglovin/blogs – lots of other bloggers have written about their weddings and happily share their thoughts, photos and vendors, which is a great way of finding inspiration. 

Being a wedding guest – lots of my friends have been getting married recently and I’ve been inspired by their ideas, one of my recently married pals is even giving me some candle holders to use. 

Wedding magazines – to be honest these are a bit of a ripoff as they’re mostly adverts but if you find one in a hairdresser’s or dentist’s have a flick through. 

Wedding fairs – there are the big expensive ones in convention centres that cost a lot to go to, and then there are smaller ones hosted by venues, that are often free, and are a great way of seeing what’s available where you are. I’m off to one on Sunday just to get some more ideas. 

Specialist websites/apps – I came across Guides for Brides, which is basically a directory of wedding venues and vendors.  They also have a free app you can download to help keep track of your vendors and budget. There are loads of other wedding planner apps too. 

Have you got any suggestions from your own wedding planning or just things you’ve come across? Something you really liked at a wedding you went to? Share in the comments below.